The spider and I have begun playing this game where I destroy his home every morning and he rebuilds it by the end of the day. My plan is to exhaust him into retirement, because I don’t have the heart to kill him. I don’t know, it’s not like I’m the kind of person that captures small spiders or ants in cups and releases them back outside (they’re just gonna come back in people, you’re not doing them any favors). But with this spider, it’s different. Maybe destroying his home everyday and making him rebuild it is just as cruel as killing him, but the way I see it, I’m probably helping him achieve some workout goal he wouldn’t otherwise attain.
I think maybe another month and he’ll be so over having to rebuild his web that he just gives up and moves next door. If he would just build the stupid thing in the other window that’s right there, we could avoid all this drama and live in peace. But no, he wants to catch his food right in my face.
Anyway, I’ll let you know how that goes. I’m sure you’ll be waiting to hear about it.
I watched this documentary today called “Hot Girl Wanted” about the amateur porn industry. It was very sad, if not very informative. The rationalization these girls (who are all between 18-25) give for doing what they do is so sad. And when they talk about some of their experiences, you can see how much they hate it but they’re always like “gotta pay these bills.” And I’m like, but… why? There’s gotta be a better way right? I don’t know, it’s too easy for me, someone who has never been in that position, to say well go get a real job and an education and you’ll be fine. Plenty of people get educations and still end up unemployed.
There’s so many problems! How can we fix them all! That’s what happens when you watch almost every documentary on Netflix people. Your brain is overloaded with how many causes there are, how many problems we’ve created for ourselves, that you just become overwhelmed and decide to eat a bowl of ice cream instead.
Just, one thing about Brucelyn Jendashian. I don’t have an opinion about the sex change thing, I don’t feel I need to have one really. But the whole transgender thing truly confuses me. Not in a “ew gross” kind of way, but in a, “what does it mean for a male to feel female?” sort of way. Our society is all about the gender equality thing, which is good. Fair treatment, yup yup. And I’ve heard of parents saying ‘I let my girls play with trucks or my boys play with dolls if they want there is no gender definition’ so on and so forth. Okay. So.. then what does it mean when a person who was born a man says he feels he is a woman? What feminine traits have made that person feel they identify more with one gender, when we are trying to, as a society, say that gender is fluid? That it shouldn’t be boxed in? Why did Caitlyn Jenner feel she had to get boobs and all the girl parts? What is it in the female identity that made her feel she had to give up the male part of herself completely? And then the first thing she does to announce herself to the world is get dressed up and do a photoshoot and get some nice airbrushed magazine treatment? Is that what it means to be female?
It’s all just, very interesting and confusing and humanity is just a spiral of madness and questions. I think I’ll give up on thinking and go rob a bank, buy an island and live forever in peace. Until someone comes to steal my island and then I have to suit up for war, and then they try to establish a government on my island which will inevitably lead to me trying to emancipate myself from their tyranny. Then I’d have to flee to another island and start the cycle all over again.