Episode 1: Taking Songs Literally

You’ve probably heard Usher’s newest song, “The Opposite of Slut Shaming” or as I think the radio people call it, “I Don’t Mind.” It’s about how he refuses to give his girlfriend money for college because she’d rather be a stripper. He has to have money he could give her because in one verse he says he’s going to show up after her shift in a ‘Rari, which I believe means Ferrari. I could be wrong. I’ve been told I’m not black enough so I may be completely disconnected from my people and ‘Rari is actually a level down from a hooptie.

Anyway, if my assumptions are correct and he does in fact own a Ferrari, he should be able to help her out with some cash, right? Because as far as I know, Ferrari’s are expensive. I mean, I don’t know where they rate on the fancy car scale. My car has peeling paint and rust stains and makes awful noises into the night, so just having a quiet car is fancy to me. Anyway, according to my google search, Ferrari’s range from between $188,000 to $400,000. Now, I’m under the assumption that if you’ve got Ferrari money, you’ve got full price money. I could be wrong! I could be, I’m just guessing here.

If he can afford an almost $400,000 car, couldn’t he afford to at least let her explore her other talents? Let her take a painting class at a community college? Maybe do yoga, since I’m assuming she continues to strip to stay fit? Maybe he’s trying to empower her, because he does tell her, several times, in the song to “go get that money.” I know I’m doing a lot of assuming here, and maybe I’m gleaning all my knowledge from the wrong sources since I personally do not know any strippers. But don’t people do that to pay their bills till something better comes along? Wouldn’t a boyfriend who drives a Ferrari be that “something better”? Has she not considered asking him for a loan?

This has been another addition of: Taking Songs Literally. Tune in next time when we discuss why if Ne-yo knew his rent was going to be late 7 days prior, he didn’t discuss it with his landlord. And why instead he went to the club to blow what little money he did have. Does Ne-yo have a terminal illness that has caused him exhibit such YOLO behavior? These questions and more, next time.

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